Welcome to TX: Land of Lobotomized Drivers
Ever feel like everyone around you is stoooopid? Feel like they're all walking around on autopilot? Just a little too "dazed and confused" for your taste? Hmmm...
YOU MUST BE IN TEXAS.
I have been saying it since I moved here. People in Texas are stupid. Now mind you, not everyone in Texas is stupid. In fact, I pride myself on knowing several native Texans of quite high intelligence. But one only has to look at the drivers to see: the general population in Texas, or more specifically, Dallas, has a lower intelligence level than other parts of the country.
In my opinion, anyway.
See, I view the way people drive as a barometer that measures their "smartness" level. Distracted people are all over the road. Assholes drive like assholes, cutting people off, driving WAY too fast, etc. Soccer moms with 6 screaming pre-teens in the car drive like...soccer moms with 6 screaming pre-teens in the car.
But the most infuriating drivers are the ones that oooooooze down the street / avenue / tollway / freeway / parking lot / sidewalk going 3.5 miles UNDER the speed limit, totally oblivious that there is a whole other world out there besides what's (not) going on between their ears. What, praytell, is the cause of this otherworld-like quality that causes such a vast number of Dallas-area people to drive as if they've been lobotomized??
Here it is...get ready: they HAVE been lobotomized.
Not sure if you've heard, but there are significant amounts of ANTI-DEPRESSANTS floating around in Dallas-area water. Now, they SAY that it hasn't made its way into our drinking water...YET. But do you think they'd admit even for a second that these drugs HAVE made it into the drinking water, unless they had a solution all planned out for when people find out and panic??? NO! Of course not! They may never even tell us at all! I wouldn't put it past them to just come up with a plan and then quietly implement it so it gets corrected without mass freaking out.
So I think people ARE drinking their lobotomies. Don't believe me? Use me as just one example: I'm intelligent. I'm a very aware and conscious driver. I read regularly, am able to multi-task quite successfully, do well in my job, and I use my turn signal whenever my car is going to move somewhere other than the place it is currently (like, oh I don't know, let's see...CHANGING LANES AND TURNING LEFT OR RIGHT). And here's the kicker: I don't drink tapwater.
Of course, you don't have to take my word for it. I'm just a pissed off and very opinionated non-Texan trapped here for a while and forced to drive through a throng of babbling idiots every day.
YOU MUST BE IN TEXAS.
I have been saying it since I moved here. People in Texas are stupid. Now mind you, not everyone in Texas is stupid. In fact, I pride myself on knowing several native Texans of quite high intelligence. But one only has to look at the drivers to see: the general population in Texas, or more specifically, Dallas, has a lower intelligence level than other parts of the country.
In my opinion, anyway.
See, I view the way people drive as a barometer that measures their "smartness" level. Distracted people are all over the road. Assholes drive like assholes, cutting people off, driving WAY too fast, etc. Soccer moms with 6 screaming pre-teens in the car drive like...soccer moms with 6 screaming pre-teens in the car.
But the most infuriating drivers are the ones that oooooooze down the street / avenue / tollway / freeway / parking lot / sidewalk going 3.5 miles UNDER the speed limit, totally oblivious that there is a whole other world out there besides what's (not) going on between their ears. What, praytell, is the cause of this otherworld-like quality that causes such a vast number of Dallas-area people to drive as if they've been lobotomized??
Here it is...get ready: they HAVE been lobotomized.
Not sure if you've heard, but there are significant amounts of ANTI-DEPRESSANTS floating around in Dallas-area water. Now, they SAY that it hasn't made its way into our drinking water...YET. But do you think they'd admit even for a second that these drugs HAVE made it into the drinking water, unless they had a solution all planned out for when people find out and panic??? NO! Of course not! They may never even tell us at all! I wouldn't put it past them to just come up with a plan and then quietly implement it so it gets corrected without mass freaking out.
So I think people ARE drinking their lobotomies. Don't believe me? Use me as just one example: I'm intelligent. I'm a very aware and conscious driver. I read regularly, am able to multi-task quite successfully, do well in my job, and I use my turn signal whenever my car is going to move somewhere other than the place it is currently (like, oh I don't know, let's see...CHANGING LANES AND TURNING LEFT OR RIGHT). And here's the kicker: I don't drink tapwater.
Of course, you don't have to take my word for it. I'm just a pissed off and very opinionated non-Texan trapped here for a while and forced to drive through a throng of babbling idiots every day.
posted by Jadyn at 7:43 AM
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